Setting Two | Chilling on the Boat

There is spring water on my boat I got the other day at Whole Foods. My new heater is on setting “2” which is the highest setting. It’s been working–

My stomach hurts.

I went to Whole Foods to get a matcha latte and some young coconut meat and a Hoplark Hop Tea. I didn’t realize the brand wasn’t “Hop Tea.” I thought it was Hop Tea but it’s actually Hoplark. Hope Tea is a way cooler name and much more straightforward. They have Hoplark printed vertically on the side (?) of the can and it doesn’t exactly catch your attention. Of all the Hoplark teas I prefer the green right now because of the taste and also because it might be slightly easier to drink on an empty stomach.

I injected BPC-157 into my knee this morning about an hour after waking up. I’m getting good at injecting it really close to the LCL. I like the ritual. Grab the little party pack out of the bow with the syringes and alcohol swabs. Get the BPC-157 out of the fridge and set everything up on the table. Get my knee ready, pull my pants or long underwear down and pinch the skin to find a suitable injection site but first palpitate the tendon a bit to see where it’s sore; that’s where I want to inject. Swab the top of the container holding the BPC-157 and also the part of my knee where I’m going to inject. Swab it good. Then pull the safeties off either end of the syringe and pull the white plunger part out till it’s at about 20 then turn the BPC-157 vial upside down and with my left hand try to puncture the membrane of the vial right in the middle of the little circle. Draw it out till it’s past 20, watching it fill, then push it in till it’s no more than 20 but no less than 15. Pinch the skin in my right hand and then insert the needle and slowly push the plunger until all the liquid is in me, and then pull the needle out, grab the swab and apply pressure where the needle went in. After 15 seconds or so throw the swab in the garbage, put the caps back on the syringe and put it in a little ziplock bag for used syringes. When I was on the ferry the other day I disposed of all my old used syringes in the sharps container. I felt a big strange doing it. I would’ve felt weird if anyone walked in. It was a lot of syringes. But no one walked in and afterward I washed my hands.

Last night when I got back from Nate’s I made myself some yogurt with mango and oats. First I got the mango, which wasn’t quite ripe, an ataulfo mango, and using a knife sliced all the skin off. Then I cut strips of it off the side until most of the meat was gone, and then using my hands ate the rest of the meat that was still attached to the seed. This is my favorite part, sinking my teeth into this flesh. Then I got the yogurt out and put some of the chunks in and poured some lightly-toasted oats on top. It was way too late to be eating and probably why I feel like shit today. I don’t feel like shit today, but my digestive system could be better. Then I sat on the bench seat with this yogurt mixture and ate all the good stuff out, and then put more mango and oats in, repeating the process till all the mango was gone. And then I didn’t watch YouTube videos because I’m only allowed to watch YouTube videos till 10pm. I’m only allowed to use the internet till 11pm, at which point I can journal or read or just go to sleep but usually I journal for a little bit then read and within 15 or so minutes I’m pretty tired. I get up for one last pee and then unplug the LED string lights, then turn off the portside LED dome light, and then finally the starboard LED dome light. Then I get in bed. Of course before this I’ve already put the wooden hatch boards in and also wedged the boat hook in between the the lip of the deck and part of the sliding part of the roof so if someone were to come on the boat they either wouldn’t be able to open the hatch, or they MIGHT be able to open the hatch with a lot of force but it would be really loud and I’d quickly spring over to the galley and grab my knife. That’s the plan. There are a lot of tweakers where I live.

We sang songs at Nate’s. Nate and Hunter played guitar and I sang. They sang too. We sang Beatles songs and Nirvana and Tom Petty. Buddy was on the ground and can’t really move cuz he got vaccines injected into his hind legs yesterday and now they’re all stiff.

My knee felt sore this morning and I’m not really sure why. I didn’t really take any falls climbing yesterday. I didn’t really do any knee intensive moves. I didn’t really climb hard yesterday. Maybe it’s all the BPC injections. Maybe I AM kind of doing like a poor man’s PRP. Either way the region where my LCL inserts into the fibula is a bit sore. I’ve also become completely dependent on my knee sleeve. It feels really weird not to wear it. I feel really unstable. And I can’t find the black knee sleeve I usually wear at night.

Now I’m drinking my hop tea and I have no plans for today. I don’t know if I’m realistically going to do any job applications. Or volunteer applications. I don’t know what I’m going to do. Maybe I’ll go to my parents’. I was thinking about driving to Wenatchee to stay there but that’s like three hours driving there, three hours driving back. I don’t need to do that. Plus then I spend money on a hotel. I don’t need to do that. I’d rather (I think I’d rather, at least) take walks around here and hopefully hang out with someone in the evening.

Last Day || Richland, WA to Seattle, WA

Somewhere near Richland.

As I walked to Wal-Mart this morning I thought, Why should I rush to get home? Why should I rush to get this Wal-Mart experience over with? Why should I rush to have my matcha tea, why should I rush to get back to the hotel, why should I rush to see what breakfast they have, why should I rush up to my room, to get packed and changed and ready to go, to write this post.

Why should I rush to do anything at all?

We spend our lives rushing about, only to realize it did nothing to hasten or delay the arrival of death. When you die will it matter all the stuff you did? Will it matter, all the things you crammed into every day? The things you stressed about?

It’s snowing outside the Home 2 Suites by Hilton in Richland, WA, and my tea has just finished brewing. I’m sitting on the couch in my immaculate room, this, finally, the NICEST room I’ve stayed in this entire trip. It took till the last night to find the perfect hotel. That’s what this trip was about, staying in hotels. Finding myself in hotels across the US and Mexico, watching YouTube videos. Watching chess videos. Watching bouldering videos. Drinking tea.

Today I’ll pack up my stuff, leave my hotel room, start my car, amble onto the freeway, and drive home to Seattle. I have mixed feelings about this. Sure, I’m excited as fuck. That goes without saying. But at the same time if there’s ANYTHING this trip has taught me is that arriving at your destination doesn’t matter. Things aren’t going to be great “once you get there.” Things aren’t going to be great “once you get to Guam,” or “once you get to Mexico,” or “once you go on vacation,” or “once your kids are back in school,” or “once you get that job promotion,” or “once you start making more money,” or “once you start eating better.”

OK, the eating better thing is actually kind of a big one.

But seriously, we spend our entire leaves thinking we’ll be happy ONCE SOMETHING HAPPENS. Our ability to be happy is so conditional. Watch, sometime, yourself having these thoughts, and then watch what happens when you get the thing that you thought would be it, or the place you thought that once you got there everything would be fine, and watch how as soon as these things are attained your little rat brain goes searching for some other requirement to make it happy. Oh, we’ll be happy once we get to our hotel and we can relax and unpack our stuff and go swimming in the pool. But then you get to your hotel, and other little things come up. Where are we going to dinner? We’ll be happy once we just get some dinner. We’ll be happy once we just get a good night’s rest. And on and on and on and on until it becomes, oh, we’ll be happy once this vacation is just over and we’re home.

(hold on a sec while I get my tea).

Or maybe you guys don’t have this problem. Maybe I’m the only one sitting in the Hilton in Richland eating sardines with jalapenos for breakfast because he thinks a low-carb diet will solve his knee troubles.

Anyway.

Now I’m worried that this entire room smells like sardines. K, I really need to drink my tea.

All I know is this: this is literally the only thing I know: that my body feels better when I eat a diet lower in carbs, lower in grains. I feel like I have less inflammation. Like if I eat a big thing of rice? My fingers and joints instantly start cracking. I feel like my body’s on fire. But when I eat a low carb diet? My body feels lubed up. I feel light. I feel like a kid again, albeit a kid with a partially torn LCL.

Except maybe it’s not torn anymore. Maybe it’s kind of healed and it just needs to continue in the remodeling phase and I need to load and……all that other stuff.

And so, I’m going to savor the drive today. Fuck that, I’m going to savor everything about today. I’m going to savor the wonderful sound my car makes when starting up, the familiar purr despite always fearing a bit it won’t start up. I’m going to savor the crunch of the tires on the snow as I slowly drive out of the hotel parking lot and towards the arterials. I’m going to savor the whine of the engine as I pull onto an onramp and get it up to speed on the interstate. I’m going to savor driving by Yakima. I’m going to savor driving by Ellensburg (that one’ll be tough for some reason). I’m going to savor the snow that will inevitably be falling. I’m going to savor the first glimpse I get of Seattle as the skyscrapers peak over Beacon Hill when I come out of the tunnel after Mercer Island.

And if all this goes to shit, if my car doesn’t start, if there’s tons of traffic going over the pass, then, well, I’m going to savor that too. No expectations. Savoring everything that comes my way, including this shitty cup of earl grey. Savoring the lingering taste of sardines in my mouth.

No, but seriously.

 

Snow in Twin Falls || The Grand Road Trip

No desire to get out of bed today. It’s snowing:

This is a horribly taken picture from my hotel room here in Twin Falls with my laptop. My iPhone is out of battery so I couldn’t use that. Like I said, it’s snowing, sideways, and I don’t think I can get out of bed until it’s stopped snowing or until the I-84 webcams show the interstate as being at least somewhat clear. Here’s how they look now:

If you think I’m gonna get out there in drive in that you’ve got that exact thing coming. Because that is what I’m going to do. Once I slowly muster myself here, and drink some tea, and pack my shit, and finish raging at the stupid neighbors above me who spent all night stomping around, I’m going to hit the road. I don’t know how far I’ll make it. Maybe only to Boise. But I’m going to hit the road all the same since there’s no way I’m staying here again with these neighbors above me. I’d rather at least make it to Boise.

Also, tomorrow looks like a decent day for driving.

As the morning draws on the roads should get better. It is still snowing, though.

I desperately need to shave. Maybe what I’ll do is get up, walk over to Winco Foods, get some tea, get either another mechanical razor or maybe even an electric razor, attempt to shave, stretch or pad around my room and rage at the neighbor upstairs, and then finally start loading up the Subi.

The Subi.

Her name is not Bella. She rejected that name.

Also I’ve been looking at other Subi’s. In the 2014 year range. If I do get a new car I have two requisites: 1) That it be less than 10 years old. 2) That it have less than 100,000 miles on it. Maybe even less than 80,000 miles on it. I can’t even imagine getting into a car I own and being like, “Damn, this feels really comfortable and safe.” Because right now when I get into the Subi I think, “Get me the fuck out of here,” and, “We’re going to die.”

I really need to get her brakes checked out.

Yesterday I asked my friend Steve two questions: 1) What US state would you least want to live in? and 2) What Latin American Country would you least want to live in? He said Indiana and El Salvador. Indiana cuz of the vibes he’s gotten while driving through there, and El Salvador for the crime. I said Kansas or Nebraska or somewhere in the Deep South. And on third thought it would probably be somewhere in the deep south for me. Whichever deep south state has the worst bouldering. As for Latin American country: Honduras.

K, almost time to walk over to Winco Foods.

I went to Barnes and Noble yesterday and spent 40 minutes contemplating which book to buy, the whole time standing there farting cuz I’d just had a bunch of dates, and then eventually left empty-handed. I really wanted the Elton John autobiography, but if I bought that I got another book at 50% off, and none of the other books at 50% off looked that good. And I couldn’t bring myself to buy the EJ book without taking advantage of the deal. So eventually I left.

The idea today was to make it to the Tri-Cities. At least to Pendleton or La Grande. That’s definitely not happening.

It will not stop snowing.

At the same time, I must look at the positives of the snow. If I had woken up and saw this as a little kid, I would’ve been stoked. I would’ve been prancing around the room in my undies. I would’ve been stoked for the hotel breakfast and stoked to get in the car and stoked to have adventures. The snow is beautiful. I’m in a strange town, in Twin Falls. As long as I take it easy on the highway and drive carefully, the world, aka Idaho, is my oyster, aka spud. So now I’m actually going to get out of bed. I’m going to get bundled up. And I’m going to walk across the street to the grocery store. It is a winter wonderland, and I plan to walk in it.