The sun is barreling forward in its attempts to climb higher in the sky and I feel pretty good about things. There’s a bit of resignation, to be fair, but what if instead of fighting to be the person I want to be, as Clara suggested, I fought to accept the person I am? Would that work? It certainly seems easier. It’s not like I won’t still be trying to improve myself, because that’s somewhat natural (at least in American culture) and there’s certainly a time and place for that, but when I try to improve myself or make drastic changes at the wrong time it usually seems to backfire.
These things in mind, I feel pretty good about my trip to Mexico tomorrow. I’m flying to Puerto Vallarta nonstop on Alaska Airlines, staying a night at the Comfort Inn near the airport, and then flying to Guadalajara the next day on Aeromar, everyone’s sixth favorite Mexican national airline. Then, I’ll meet up with my friend Darren, we’ll chill in GDL a few days, and then we’ll begin our inexorable march towards Mexico City via Morelia, the capital of Michoacan, and some other small towns on the way. And then five days in Mexico City. Or so. And from there, who knows? Maybe Belize. Maybe El Salvador. Maybe Bogota. Maybe Chile. Maybe all of those places or maybe some place different entirely like French Guyana or Suriname.
My succulents are stoked right now cuz they’re getting direct sun. I’m a bit anxious right now because I haven’t done much work today and also because of my trip tomorrow. Luckily, I don’t have to do much. I have to pack (easy). I have to maybe clean up the boat a little bit (fairly easy). And I have to not drink too much caffeine (potentially hard). It’s also OK if I don’t do much work today, since I can definitely get some done at the airport tomorrow, and tomorrow night at the Comfort Inn in Puerto Vallarta, everyone’s fourth favorite airport hotel, I have nothing to do and so could potentially work. Also, my work with Booking.com hasn’t fully picked up again since dropping off right before the holidays. I have about a day and a half of work this week, which is better than zero, but still not enough to be super stressful (or pay the bills). Basically what I’m trying to say is that my anxieties are somewhat unfounded, as they usually are. Everything will be fine, as it usually is, and if for some reason it’s not fine I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it. I enjoy crossing bridges. I don’t enjoy looking down when I cross bridges, however, because I feel a strange impulse to jump.
Not sure what else to talk about. It’s March 1st. There’s a kingfisher on the boathouse across from me and a massive flock of crows just alighted on the tree on shore and are having a loud conversation. I climbed yesterday at SBP Fremont, and it was fairly great. Flashed some oranges. Didn’t send any blacks or blues but didn’t try a bunch either. I won’t climb for a month now, and I’m ready to let my body heal. That’s part of the reason for this trip — to take a break from climbing. I love climbing, but there’s nothing like a break to make you love it more. Last year when I couldn’t climb for two months because of my LCL I came back more motivated than ever and in many ways climbing better than ever. When you take a long break sometimes you unlearn bad habits, and if you watch videos of the pros, you learn new ones that you can implement when you start climbing again. And if anything hopefully my back is just happy.
Is it time to go to Whole Foods?
No, I’m going to keep writing until I get to 1000 words.
Is anyone still there?
What am I going to do in Guadalajara, you might be wondering? What do I do when I travel? Well, I don’t do a ton. I mostly go to cafes and walk around. Which is more or less exactly what I do in Seattle, though when you’re doing it in a place you don’t really know speaking a language that’s not your native language it feels a little more special. Also, I lived in Guadalajara five years ago, teaching English at a place called Vancouver Language Centre and Spanish at the American consulate. I’ve only kept in touch with one person from my time there, so I hope to see her. But mostly I just hope to walk around and visit some of my old haunts and enjoy the ridiculously sunny, warm, temperatures, and enjoy our ridiculously chic AirBnb, and hang out with Darren. I don’t know how much drinking will be involved. I hope not too much. I was talking with my therapist today about how not all epiphanies are created equal, and how the epiphanies from drinking don’t measure up to those of a three or even one day fast. And I believe this wholeheartedly. When you fast your hierarchy of needs gets completely revamped, and so things that might’ve competed for attention in consciousness when you had nothing else to worry about just sort of fade away, and some other things that are actually quite important drift to the forefront. Last time I fasted moving to Leavenworth came up again, for example. And how it’s a good idea. How basically not living in Seattle is a good idea.
OK, that’s about it for now. I think it’s time to go to Whole Foods. I think I want some more caffeine and I would maim for an Urban Remedy matcha bar right now. Urban Remedy, will you sponsor me? Or employ me? Probably not.
I hope you’re all having a wonderful week. I look forward to blogging from Puerto Vallarta tomorrow, aka the Comfort Inn, everyone’s sixteenth favorite airport hotel.